At First

So, at first, like yesterday, I was really hating being where I am in life right now. With my son leaving home this week it just seemed like the close of one phase of mommyhood, and quite frankly, I'm not ready for that. But, then, like today, I took my eyes and put them on the great things that are yet ahead for me. So much depends on where we set our eyes. What you see truly becomes what you get.

The Red Lamp

So, the other day my son left for a missions trip to Australia. I want every good thing in life for him. Every dream to come true for him and every experience to be genius. I want him to grow and be all that God has for him to be. To travel and have a big life. But that still doesn't make his absence here any easier for me to bear. So the red lamp. When he moved back into the house a few months ago, he brought home this red lamp. I put it on this buffet table right outside of my bedroom and its the light we'd leave on at night for the last person home to turn off. It was almost never me and almost always him that would be the last one in and would turn off the lamp. Well last night I had to turn that lamp off. Tears flooded down my face. The reality that he's not here ... who knew it would be so hard. Not me.